The Play Day

I know you're dying to know how the tournament went last week. Technically it was a "play day," which is one of half a dozen or so events hosted at private golf clubs every year, giving MSGA members a chance to play at clubs they normally wouldn't have access to. Last week's play day was at the Suburban Club, which is a well-kept course in Baltimore County, within a 15-minute drive from my house. Play days are pretty no-frills. There's no lunch or awards dinner and no goodie bags like you'd get at a charity tournament. You just register and pay in advance and show up at your tee time when the day comes.

Hubby and I played as a mixed couple, and we knew in advance that there would only be one other mixed couple playing. I'll call them the Mouthpiece and Mrs. Robinson, since he was a chatty lawyer and she was about a decade older than him. Our tee time was at 12:40 pm, and so was theirs. Our handicaps were 19 (me) and 13 (hubby), and theirs were 14 (her) and 5 (him). They knew each other from being members at the same private club in another county. They weren't married, but had already played several play day tournaments as a team, and won. "He doesn't even like me," said Mrs. Robinson of her partner. "He's just using me."

I was a bit nervous, but not really. I knew that we'd have to play flawlessly to have a shot at beating them, even with all the extra strokes we'd be getting due to our handicaps. I just wanted to have a good time and hopefully break 100. Hubby was hoping we'd win, and if he played as well as he'd been playing lately, we'd have a shot. Mixed couple scoring means whichever partner's score is lowest on a hole stands for the couple's score.

Unfortunately, the weather had been cruel the day before, with heavy rains drenching all the golf courses into soggy sponges. On tournament day, there was a chance of rain, but it stayed dry nearly till the end. On my first tee shot, I hit the ground and splattered mud across my jacket, which pretty much forecast the kind of day I would have.

Fortunately, the Mouthpiece and Mrs. Robinson weren't assholes. I think they were actually kind of bored playing against us, since we weren't much of a challenge. I also think they played worse than they could have, since they got lazy as the round progressed. The Mouthpiece made some mediocre shots you'd never think someone with a 5 handicap could even make. And Mrs. Robinson got lazy about counting strokes and said she made a 5 on one hole, when I'm pretty sure she made a 7. Not that 2 strokes mattered. They beat us handily. I guess hubby and I could have had them DQ'd if we were hard-asses. But we're not. In the end, I shot 100 even. As a team, hubby and I grossed an 89 and netted 72. So I guess you could say that, as a golfing couple, we are right on par.