Ersatz Golf

So hubby and I finally got to play Pebble Beach last week. Wish I could say it was at the real course in California, but it was just a simulator round at a course in a neighboring county. With temps in the teens and no golf trips in sight, we decided to try a couple of golf substitutes to see if they even come close to the real thing.

The simulator round involved bringing our real golf bags to a real golf course. Out on an enclosed patio with space heaters, they'd set up a computer and hitting bay with a screen. It cost $45 an hour, which was enough time to play 9 holes. Using the computer, you pick a famous course you'd like to play -- we picked Pebble Beach. Before each shot, you drag a pointer in the direction you're aiming, and the screen view adjusts so it looks like you're facing that way.

The big projector screen reflects whatever is shown on the computer. Then, it's up to you to take a swing at a real ball with your real club. There's a lighted box area on the turf where you can tee up your ball or hit it off the mat and a camera device will register your swing. After you take your shot, the computer will show you some stats like your clubhead speed, yardage, etc. Both hubby and my shots were tracking about 20-50 yards shorter than normal, but this could have been due to the fact that it was about 30 degrees on the covered patio, even with space heaters around.

If you hit a bad shot, like I did when I was still getting used to the whole set up, you can end up off in the deep rough. But fortunately there aren't any bugs.

The computer will even show you the break on the green. On one shot, I had to hit out of a bunker. It's much easier when the sand isn't real. Once on the green, it's virtually impossible to make a decent putt. We were advised to set the game so that putts within 10 feet were gimmies. Otherwise, it might take a half hour to get through one hole.

Hubby and I got through 10 holes in the allotted hour, and we didn't do half bad. Hubby made a birdie and I made a few pars. Overall, it was fun, but I don't think I'd make a regular habit out of it. The projected screen didn't have high enough resolution to transport me to Pebble Beach in any way. While it was enjoyable to watch the computer-generated flyovers between holes on the screen, the rest of the scenery was uninspiring. There's nothing like looking out at the real ocean and feeling the warmth of real sun when you're playing in real life. 

The other golf substitute we tried was Top Golf. The outpost we went to was in a modern building with an industrial vibe.

You have to pay $5 to become a member, then you get charged by the hour for up to 6 people in one hitting bay. At the location we went to, it was $35 per hour.

A guest attendant brings you and your party to a covered hitting bay, where they have men's and ladies' clubs to use. You can also bring your own clubs. There's a computer screen where you can try a variety of target games and keep score. There's also a big coffee table surrounded by comfy sectional furniture, and you can order from a bar menu of things to eat and drink. Top Golf seems to be more of a social activity, like bowling, where even novices can enjoy themselves without pressure.

Of course, I was there to get my swing on. I wasn't impressed with the stock clubs, but even if I had brought my own, the balls they make you use are limited-flight balls, which really takes the air out of the whole venture. The farthest target was around 180 yards, and the net behind it was about 200, so the focus was more on taking aim at a flag and hitting straight. The hitting bay is completely open in the front, so even with heat on the other sides, you can feel the chill on a cold winter day.

The Top Golf tab was about $105 for 2 hours with food and drink, so it was pricier than the simulator round. Would I do either again? Well, I'm glad I tried these substitutes and I did have fun. But I'd rather wait for a spring thaw since neither was as good as the real thing.

Golf Resolutions for 2018

Happy New Year. Again. Can you believe I've been writing this golf blog for 6 years? And once again, I begin the year with a look back at my golf resolutions and a look forward to new ones.

Last year, I kept it simple with:

#1: Stay fit for golf. Well, I made it through the year without any major injuries. My gluteal pseudo-sciatica pain seems to be under control and I've been able to survive 5-hour plane rides and even 8-hour car drives without a relapse. I still stretch like crazy, do Pilates every week, and do at least 30 minutes of low-impact cardio every day, with hand-weight and upper-body exercises a few times a week. I was fit enough to play at least 50 rounds this past year, so I think I did okay with this resolution.

Now how about 2018?

Resolution #1: Continue to stay fit for golf.  Since I started golfing, I have avoided riding golf carts and walk with my pull-cart instead. As a result, I routinely develop minor foot issues such as black toenails and calluses. Toward the end of the 2017 season, I developed a rather persistent corn on my left pinky-toe, which is taking more than a week to heal. So, foot care is something I will need to work into my overall fitness routine. (Sorry if that's TMI, but on the other hand, if you have a foot fetish, maybe that paragraph turned you on in a weird way.)

Resolution #2: Break 80. I broke 100 in 2011, I broke 90 in 2012. Theoretically, I should have broken 80 in 2013. But, as most amateur golfers know, it just ain't that easy. However, in late-August, I shot my personal best of 83. And thanks to a bunch of other rounds in the low-to-mid 80s this past year, I ended the season with a 14.5 handicap. If all goes well, in 2018, I may just shave off 4 more strokes off my all-time low and break 80.

Resolution #3: Grow the game. I've always been kind of a golf evangelist among my family and friends. Ever since I started playing, I've made an effort to take my young nephews out to the putting green or the driving range just for fun. I've taken several of them to their first golf lesson or their first round on a real golf course. When my oldest nephew was 12, I let him drive a golf cart by himself for the first time. Now, he's 25 and has rekindled his interest in golf. He said he likes golf because "It's a gentleman's game, but you still get dirty and stuff." He also likes that he can hit balls really far. Hubby and I have taken him out golfing a few times and we really enjoy watching his game develop. I have 7 nephews, so if all of them end up being golfers, I think I will have done a decent job growing the game.

I can also take credit for introducing my goddaughter to golf. I gave her a Snoopy set of plastic golf clubs when she was a toddler, so I started the brainwashing early. Now she's 8 and has been taking lessons for less than a year, but her mother says she's ready to play tournaments soon. Hubby and I took her to her first round on a par-3 course. We look forward to taking her out to an 18-hole course this summer.

If I knew when I was young that golf was this much fun, I would have started at a much younger age. But watching these young people fall in love with the game is the next best thing.

That's it for now. I better stop making resolutions before the year has even begun. The weather is in the teens around here, and all the local golf courses are closed. In a week or so, temps might edge back into the 30s, so I might manage to get out for a winter round. Stay tuned.

End-of-Season Update

The bad news is the handicap season ended two weeks ago in my neck of the woods. The good news is my handicap ended at an all-time low of...

The bad news is that until March 15, none of my scores can count toward my handicap, so the 88 from the gold tees I shot yesterday won't count, even though it would have helped my handicap. The good news is that since I get emailed my handicap update every two weeks, I will be seeing the number 14.5 steadily till spring. It will be a great reminder of what I've accomplished this past season with my humble amateur sports hobby, the great game of golf.

The bad news is yesterday may have been the last round I play till next year. The weather was in the mid-50s and sunny with little wind. At 1pm, I was sweating in my thick, knitted visor hat plus my base layer turtleneck and felted cashmere sweater. Did I ever mention that the warmest clothing for golf could quite possibly be a cashmere sweater that you accidentally washed and put in the dryer? Cashmere is eight times warmer than sheep's wool and the felted fibers form a compact knit that blocks wind but still allows movement. I felt so warm it could have a springtime round. I actually shot just 5 over on the front nine and started having serious visions of breaking 80. But then the afternoon chill set in, and my brain and fingers stopped working properly. 

The good news is that as long as there isn't snow on the ground, I can still make it out to play golf. Might be time to accidentally leave another cashmere sweater in the dryer.

Deep Thoughts About Sub 15

Drum roll please... my current handicap is 14.7! After a couple of solid rounds in the 80s, I've met a longtime goal of dropping down to a 15 or better. The downside is I'm almost afraid of playing golf for fear of ruining my handicap before the end of the playing season on November 14.

So today I went out to a country club course where scoring is not allowed. That is, they happen to be refurbishing all the greens, and in the meantime they've set up temporary greens. This means that the round’s score could not count toward my handicap because the course is under repair. On the temporary tee card, they even printed, "Don’t post this score!"

It's a beautiful golf course, and today was a wonderfully warm fall day. I really enjoyed the autumn colors. And the perfectly flat tee grounds. What a change from public courses, where sometimes the tee grounds are more like baseball mounds.

The fairways were neatly mowed in perfect cross-hatched diamond shapes.



The picture below shows how the temporary greens are set 20 yards or so in front of the real greens.

These temporary greens have huge holes, so putting was not much of a challenge.

After awhile though, I felt something was missing. When I looked at the hole below, I thought, "Pretty picture, but it would have been nice to try and go for this green."

I began to imagine what golf would be like if there weren't any golf holes. But a golf course without holes is like eyes without a face. Or should I say, a face without eyes. 

Albert Einstein once said, “If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.” But a golf course without holes is a course without goals. 

So tomorrow I will play a course with all the holes in the proper places. I will play a round I can post. And I will hope it doesn't ruin my handicap.

When a Door Closes

So ever since the mansplaining ranger incident at the golf-course-that-shall-remain-nameless, I have boycotted the place and taken my business elsewhere. This has resulted in some new experiences I would not have had otherwise. For example, I ventured out to another state for a day trip to a golf course in the middle of some scenic farmland and took home an 86 on my scorecard. I played from the senior tees at two different courses and didn't do too shabbily. I also played a course I've neglected since spring and was rewarded with this fabulous sunset from the clubhouse patio:

And I've enlisted a new code word to start off my tee shots: "Trust." And by that, I mean, trust the line. It occurred to me that the ranger who thought I was out of alignment had no idea what my alignment process was. He thought he had the right to judge me when he didn't even even know what he was looking at. And I was shaken because, like so many women, we forever doubt ourselves.

So when someone tells you you're pointed in the wrong direction, believe in your path. Trust your line. And if a door closes, watch the world open like a window.

Mansplaining on the Course -- by a Ranger?!

So it happened again. This time on the golf course. By... a... ranger...! It was a weekday last week. I had a morning tee time and most of my round had gone well. I had even made 2 birdies and was feeling confident. Then, after I teed off on the 18^th hole, the ranger working that day drove up and said to me, “Do you mind if I show you something?”

Now, I had just hit my drive about 210 yards, which is pretty darn good for me, so I had no idea what this ranger was going to “show” me, but I had a feeling he was going to try and give me some kind of advice, since he had that air about him.

“Are you going to criticize me?” I said. “Because if you are, I do not want to hear it.”

“I just want to show you something about your set-up,” he said. Then he told me to take my normal set-up, while he watched. I complied because I was physically and mentally exhausted after walking 17 holes in 90-degree heat and I didn’t know what else to do. But I felt very uncomfortable while I was taking my set-up because I really didn’t like the idea of this guy watching me. Then the ranger pointed out that even though I had aligned myself using my club across my chest (a technique I learned a long time ago from my golf mentor, Seri), in my actual set-up, he claimed that my upper body was open to the target. Then he grinned and put his hands out, palms up, as if he was dropping some major wisdom and I should be impressed.

But instead, I got furious. How dare this guy try to “mansplain” my golf set-up? “Why are you doing this? Would you try and give advice to a man?” I asked the ranger.

“Yes, I would,” he said. But I doubted that very much.

“I think you’re only doing this because I’m a woman,” I went on. “I just hit a great drive, so how dare you try and tell me there’s something wrong with my set up. I see all kinds of crazy swings from the guys out here, and I don’t see you giving any of them any advice. Why were you watching my golf swing anyway? That’s just gross!”

At this point, the ranger seemed to get the point and drove away. I was so angry, I could barely focus on finishing the 18^th hole. Golf is very much a mental game, and this douche bag's interference with my concentration was uncalled-for. As of this writing, my handicap is 15.4. So I may not be the best golfer out there, but I am definitely not the worst. Since I was clearly not breaking any course rules, endangering the safety of others or even playing slowly, there was no reason the ranger should have stopped me during my round to say anything to me at all.

After the round, I spoke to the starter, and he said that ranger isn’t even a good golfer. Knowing this made me feel even more insulted and patronized. Why on earth would someone feel entitled to give advice when they themselves are not even qualified to do so?

I was so furious, I wrote a 2-page letter to the head pro at the golf course, recommending that they train all new rangers and other employees with the following rules:

1) DO NOT give unsolicited advice to any golfer on the course, especially women. It’s sexist and patronizing to single out women for your so-called advice.

2) DO NOT stare and watch women teeing off. It’s downright creepy.

3) DO NOT judge the technique of people playing golf unless it interferes with the safety of others on the course. Golf is hard enough without feeling like the rangers are out there, critiquing your every move.

The response? Well, I would describe it as "tepid." After not hearing from the golf course for a week, I called the head pro to find out if he had received my letter. He said he did and offered words of apology, but it seemed more like lip service than anything else. If I hadn't called, it sounded like the head pro never would have called me, and when I did call, it sounded like he really didn't want to deal with me. The whole incident and lack of response has really left a sour taste in my mouth.

Luckily, there are a ton of other great golf courses around, so I will have no problem taking my business elsewhere for the foreseeable future.

Magical Rounds and Personal Bests

On my annual sojourn to Southern California with hubby, I played some memorable rounds. The day after we arrived, we promptly went out to Encinitas Ranch, which is known as an "easy course" among the locals. I'm not at the point in my game where any course is "easy," but there is something about this place that brings out my best. The staff is super-friendly and we got paired with two affable old gents who smoked cigars but made up for it with their good-natured humor. I happened to be striping my tee shots all day, and at one point, one of the old guys sarcastically remarked, "Booorrring!" which I took to be a compliment.

The highlight of my round was this 150-yard approach shot that landed within inches of the pin:

Shots like that helped me score an 88, which was a nice way to kick off the vacation. Next stop was taking my goddaughter out for her first-ever round of golf. We went to The Loma Club, a 9-hole par 3 course with a kid-friendly vibe. Close to the trendy Liberty Public Market, it also has a hipster vibe, the kind of joint where you can get a beer and a tee time at the same counter. In fact, there is no proper pro shop, just the bar area of the attached pub, where the bartender doubles as the starter. As I was paying for our tee time, she asked, "Do you want a bloody mary with that?" even though it was only 10am.

At that hour, the course was decidedly more kid-friendly than booze-friendly. There was even a golf dad pushing his bag on a pull-cart with one arm and pulling a stroller in the other, while his toddler daughter straggled along, swinging a plastic club.

But my goddaughter is well beyond her first Snoopy set. Here's her first tee shot:

She's got an amazing swing, after only a year of lessons. Look at that extension! And the Loma Club has some sweet views of San Diego from above.

The course even has formidable bunkers that would have most adults quivering in their cleats.

But my goddaughter handled it all with ease. I'm glad I was a part of her first round, and can't wait to see her game progress.

Next stop was Torrey Pines North. The official webpage of Torrey Pines makes it sound like booking a tee time is as hard as snagging a dinner reservation at the hottest 4-star restaurant in town. Last time hubby and I played Torrey Pines North, we showed up at the course around 9am to put our names on the afternoon walk-on list. But that was in the fall, and I thought it would probably be harder to walk on since it was summer. I called the starter to ask about the likelihood of getting a walk-on tee time. He said it's possible but unpredictable, and the easiest way to get a tee time is through the online booking site. While the Torrey Pines official webpage makes it sound like you have to be a San Diego resident to book online, when you actually visit the Torrey Pines Online Reservations site, there is clearly a button for non-residents. "Just keep checking online," said the starter. "People cancel all the time and tee times open up."

As soon as I hung up, I logged on. Like magic, a tee time at 2:05pm for the next day appeared. I felt like I'd just won the lottery. I mean, this is a golf course that charges non-residents a $45 fee for advance booking. But I managed to score a next-day tee time for free (plus the $105 greens fee, of course.) Hubby even took a screenshot of our reservation in case something happened and we'd need it as proof.

Just for fun during the rest of our trip, I continued to check the site for tee times at Torrey Pines. You can book up to 48 hours ahead online, so as long as your schedule is flexible and you look at booking tee times like playing Pokemon (gotta catch 'em all), scoring a decent tee time is very possible. The South course seemed to have more open slots at any given time than the North, perhaps because the South course costs almost twice the price and is a much harder course. It could also be due to the big renovations at the North course last year, which had everyone saying it was like a whole new course.

So how did I play at the "new" North Course? Well, a heck of a lot better than last time. Back then, the kikuyu grass kicked my ass, but this time, the fairways seemed dry and trim, leading to nice rollouts. Even the rough seemed like a million tiny golf tees sticking in the air, so even if my ball landed in them, it remained perched and ready for striking.

But perhaps the biggest change was the addition of shorter forward tees. Before, there were 4 tee grounds, with the shortest being 6122 yards. Now, there are 5 tee sets, with the shortest being 5197 yards. While shorter distance doesn't always mean easy, the lower slope rating indicates a far easier track for ladies and relatively high-handicappers like me.

Looking at the course maps, the you can see that the routing completely changed so that the front and back nines are switched. Here is the old Torrey Pines layout:

Here's the new Torrey Pines North layout:

At the new course, the most scenic holes are on the back nine, which I think is a great change, so tourists like me can try to focus and score well on the front nine, then relax and enjoy the ocean views a little more on the back. 

And that's exactly how my round played out. 

Of course, so many views at this mecca of golf are idyllic, I found myself snapping pictures the whole time.

And looking out for those ever-present paragliders who seem like they could be landing on the putting green ahead.

On the front nine, I shot only 7 over par.

On the back nine, the ocean views overcame me and I shot mostly bogeys.

In the end, I scored a 90 for the round. I was ecstatic, since that's a great score for me at such a reputedly daunting course.

I almost didn't want to play any more golf on the trip because I was afraid to ruin my buzz. But hubby and I decided to play a few more times at some courses we hadn't played in awhile.

One of them was Balboa Park, which still has the best view I've ever seen from a ladies bathroom window.

The course itself is what I would describe as "dystopian." First of all, there are so many planes flying overhead you feel like you're in a war zone. It's also long and hard from the forward tees, and conditions were tough. There were blind tee shots and crazy uphill sideways tee shots and par-3 tee shots requiring driver. Thank goodness, hubby and I decided to ride instead of walk like we did last time. But I still lost a ball in the canyon, just like last time.

After that round, my left forearm started to hurt, which was a sign that I needed to take a break. Once home back east, it would be almost 2 weeks since I played golf again.

The first time back, I went out and shot an 83 at my favorite local course, my personal best there, or anywhere. I'm not sure how I did it, except I felt refreshed from taking time away from the familiar. Or maybe I brought a little magic from that day at Torrey Pines back home.